Espetus Churrascaria

Espetus Churrascaria

1686 Market St.
(between Gough St & Valencia St)
San Francisco
Hayes Valley
(415) 552-8792

If you’ve never been to Brazil you’re probably unaware that South Americans consume ungodly amounts of red meat in their daily diet. Espetus, a relative newcomer to the San Francisco steak scene, is an addition to the churrascaria (Brazilian for steakhouses) trend muscling out traditional steakhouses for beefy dominance. The way Espetus works is this: you have a dial built into your table. Green means “yes please” which will see waiters carrying skewers of meat scurrying to your table to cut you off a slab or two. Red means “for the love of God, please stop!” after which time you’ll be prompted to raid the dessert menu, which is amazing, and for some strange reason they save for the end of the meal. Might want to make sure the Bachelor does not skip dessert.

Venue Tip: 

Pace yourself, you can overdo it very easily here. Nothing is worse than a meat coma when you should be enjoying a lap dance.  Oh and don’t waste space on the salad bar.

The Good: 
Espetus gets a wide range of clientele, is totally unpretentious, and will leave you begging for mercy towards the end.
The Bad: 
Watch out: the Brazilian equivalent of Dim Sum can leave you unable to stand if your eyes think bigger than your stomach.
Vote Up/Down:
Vote Up/Down

Price: $$$

Accepts Credit Cards: Yes

Outdoor Seating: No

Signature dish: Chicken Hearts. No, really.

Attire: Casual, Jeans will do nicely.

Needs Reservations: Recommended for larger parties.

Alcohol: Full bar

What’s next?: Southern Pacific Brewing (Beer garden in a gigantic industrial warehouse. Drink & relax all day and into the wee hours), Bloodhound (friendly staff, great mixed drinks, excellent for groups, Toronado (incredible beer selection, near lots of other bars) , Zeitgeist, Beretta (great food, hip crowd)